Observations on our welfare....
Dog Diary |
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| 8:00 a.m. | Dog food! My favourite thing! | |
| 9.30 a.m. | A car ride! My favourite thing! | |
| 9:40 a.m. | A walk in the park! My favourite thing! | |
| 10:30 a.m. | Got rubbed and petted! My favourite thing! | |
| 12:00 p.m. | Lunch! My favourite thing! | |
| 1:00 p.m. | Played in the yard! My favourite thing! | |
| 3:00 p.m. | Wagged my tail! My favourite thing! | |
| 5:00 p.m. | Milk bones! My favourite thing! | |
| 7:00 p.m. | Got to play ball! My favourite thing! | |
| 8:00 p.m. | Wow! Watched T.V. with the people! My favourite thing! | |
| 11:00 p.m. | Sleeping on the bed! My favourite thing! | |
| Cat Diary | ||
| Day 983 of my captivity: | ||
| My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. | ||
| They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. | ||
| In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. | ||
| Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. | ||
| Bastards! | ||
| There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage. | ||
| Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs. | ||
| I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. | ||
| The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. | ||
| The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now.... | ||
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| The source of these dairies, much like the cat, has eluded me. | ||
